Call Me Magick Girl

Like Baudelaire, i can say that time is a real dictature. It's changes my lovely daddy in a nervous daddy. There's nothing i can do to change it and it kills me. I don't understand why he's like that. Seriously, now he's not so kind, and sometimes very out of mind. It's "normal" because he passed trought a bad period. He doesn't totally remind the accident but... nevertheless, he's affected by that .Moreover he's father is dead. almost of the time i'm scared about my own father that's terrible ! But without him it's worse. My mom, was so tired and worried and broke that she did not care about anything and i couldn't reproch it to her, it'll be the end of the world and i can't because i don't want to hurt her. i'm afraid by the future. I don't want him to die. don't want anybody to die. Even if he's hard with everybody i don't care, he's my father, without him i'm not here. I'm his daughter and i have a broken heart but that's it who makes me write so i'm glad. I like to write. I can say all i really feel. "that's only blood from broken hearts who write the words to every songs" Maybe i'm somebody now. I don't know. Do you know who i am? And i don't care. Do you care of it? I'm lost. Are you lost too? I lost my mind somewhere wich i've never went. Do you know where is it? Where is my mind? I need help. But who is gonna help somebody who say that he doesn't need help ? Nobody. It's "normal". So please everybody, leave me alone. I like Silence and you are too noisy !

I'm physically alive. But it is enough?

Sometimes i wish i've never been born at all. There's a lot of things we have to do in order to
be a good person. Do you feel that it's the World War 3 as me i'm feeling it? maybe. But i need so many things to be alright. maybe it's me or maybe it's you. maybe i'm too more complicated...maybe you are, yeah.
Maybe. Maybe Life is a head war. And then spiritually, not physically. In my mind there's a dead hush and i can't stand myself. Spleen is hard. There's no issues, no escape, there's no way to escapte the fate. Nevermind, i understood it since a long time ago... and i don't care as i don't care about anything. Life, death. It doesn't matter. We are alive to die. My father woke up since 3 weeks i think, my grand father is dead. Death is everywhere i know. Tomorrow i can die. And i know that there is one person who is not going to do a deep crisis of crying. i'm doing a lot of faults but it's alright i just want to write in my way. English, French it doesn't matter, anybody is going to read it. And not you, my friend. Because i did a lot of faults with you too. I think i don't understand what you don't understand too. We are Alone like everybody. The sadness is in our detachment. Sometimes some person stay alone, and it's the fate who wants it and the others try to be more open and to do something with their life, and control it. The aim of what am i doing here? there's no one left. i'm an heart breaker, but i've an broken mind and Kurt were are you?? I don't have some glue ! anyway, you're glue is for heart not for mind.
what is the difference between death and live. Do you think about it ? So go away, not so far to the beauty of Spleen, welcome to the dark side my friends . Not so far from the death too.